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Speech Transcript

0:00  

Hey everybody, this is Julie van orden, the author of well with God and if you really want to learn how to level up your life, you should listen to the time to shine podcast with my really fabulous friend Scott Ferguson

0:14  

time to shine today podcast varsity squad it is Scott Ferguson and welcome to Episode 177 with my really good friend Julie van orden, She is the author of well with God. Fantastic read I do have a fantastic giveaway not only for her book, but for her journal. She really breaks down the pillars of your life and how you can infuse God in them to give you a better well being. You know, I’m a man of faith. I stand by that and I just love the conversation with Julie. It doesn’t go really super religious we we dive into Julie’s background we dive into everything about Julian how she came about to wanting to help people level up. So without further ado, I’m going to ask you to sit back break out your notebooks take some awesome notes, because I have like three pages full after our discussion. So here comes our really good friend Julie van orden, the author of well with God. Let’s level up. Time to shine today varsity squad, it is Scott Ferguson. If you’re looking to understand how your deepest desires and special gifts represents God’s roadmap to achieving your personal well being learn how your financial management and communicate, communication skills may be the key to achieving a high level of mental wellness. Find out how your spiritual interests and hobbies are just as important to your well being as your fitness and nutrition. Then you need to be hooked up with my really good friend, a woman a fellow woman of faith, Julie van orden who if you’re watching on anything, wrote this book well with God it is fantastic. I’m it’s everybody out there knows that follows me and listens that I’m a five page a day person and it’s with five different six different books going at the same time. But this is after my learning journal, my journaling in the morning. My word with God. This is the first book that I read the five pages out of in every single day I pick up knowledge nuggets that just makes just blows my mind and it’s written by my really good friend Julie van orden, who’s a trained communication skills facilitator and trained domestic mediator. She has taught hundreds of communication skills training sessions as mediated hundreds of child custody agreements which that’s gotta be just crazy in itself in the state of Maryland. She was has been a keynote speaker session leader and guest panelist for multitudes of state, local and company wide education sessions. Julie co hosted a weekly cable television show for parenting called quality time while living in the Florida Keys with her career military and fellowship mate of mine. Husband, Dan, so Julie, please come out to the time shine today varsity squad, introduce yourself. But first, what’s your favorite color? And why?

3:02  

Okay, I love color. But I’m actually very drawn to the simplicity of black and white together Really? Yeah. Because you can pop it with a vibrant color for energy. Yeah. And then you can also use like muted tones like grazer. tans, and it’s very elegant and soothing. So that’s kind of my go to.

3:25  

I love that. I love that. And so let’s get to your origin. So you were a military wife then while getting served. Okay, so you know about time apart in raising the family and keeping that all together. You’re definitely a domestic engineer during that time. But let’s get to the origins of Julie. And that would lead you in kind of the mediator and being an author and a speaker.

3:48  

Okay, so well, I actually drank the wellness Kool Aid when I was in high school. And I really tried to turn myself around from a little bit of a juvenile delinquent to recognizing that my choices had a lot to do with my outcomes. And I went to school to be in announcing and performing because I love to talk. And I thought that’s what you do you go be a broadcaster. And you know, I had some I really had some dark times in college, and I dropped out and had to like really redefine myself and find myself and things were going well at college. It just you can have everything looking good on the outside, but the inside if you’re not really walking, I think your path it can be very unbalanced, unsettling and that’s what happened for me. So when I went back, I started I changed my major to health science, ended up getting a health science degree and a master’s in health administration and I never had a book on my radar until 2018 and I was in a meditation session. Actually I am a faith driven woman and faith based. And I was literally praying about a situation at work with somebody that just like from the minute I stepped foot in the company just could not like me. And I’m on a dress things with people kind of person. And I couldn’t even go there. And I was literally praying for her because you’re supposed to pray for people. Even though they may not have felt like they earned it, but it’s they all right. So I was praying for her and God laid this book on me. And I’m like, Okay, I guess it’s time.

5:26  

An amazing book, I’m thinking of it page 7075. Because again, I, I have this kind of exercise where I read five pages a day, and it kept my mind open to different things. And all of them are like, things that helped me expound and level up. And I just noticed that, you know, squad while you’re listening, she’s got, you know, different pillars, if you will, a physical, occupational, mental, intellectual, financial, environmental, and social. And I have the same kind of teaching with my clients, that it’s almost like a jazz band, if you will, meaning, like, if one of these is out of tune, it doesn’t sound so great. But what Julie does is she brings it all back to God. I love her footnotes throughout the book squad that have actual Bible verses. But I think you did a brilliant thing. I don’t know if you did this on purpose. But when she put the Bible verses in, she didn’t actually say the Bible verse until the footnote at the back of the chapter, because people like me, I’m going to read the Bible verse and then go cross reference it to the Bible. What was nice as I wait till the end of the chapter, and then go cross reference all the verses where she put it in there, and it was just fantastic. It’s a fantastic read. There will be a giveaway at the end of this, where Julie’s gonna send a signed copy out to you on time to shine today’s dime. But okay, so you were kind of a juvenile delinquent. You said, in a sense, that probably not too bad. But you you had challenges that all kids have. was God and faith involved in your life then or was it shoved down your throat as a kid and you kind of walked away from that and came back to God or what’s your story there?

7:03  

No, I mean, I didn’t. I wasn’t raised in a family that went to church. My dad was kind of a disgruntled. I’m not gonna even say that religion, but he was disgruntled. My mother was from a kind of an off the cuff. I mean, an unconventional and so we didn’t really go to church. We didn’t do any of that. But you know what, I realized what so I came to God as a life because I was seeking, always seeking and where does that come from? I learned that that was the Holy Spirit. Yeah. So when I was a juvenile delinquent, I did not have God. I was not thinking about God. But I always thought I had street smarts. And then as I matured, I started thinking, Oh, that’s my intuition, or that’s my women’s intuition, or that’s my six cents, right? But when I started to really develop a relationship with God, I realized that God nudging me protecting me telling me which path to go down. And then when I got in lockstep with you know, I’m not always because I like to lead, I’m a go getter. So I want to go with what Julie wants. But when I just stepped back, and I get centered, and I say, I want this, but if it’s not your will lead me. Sure. Yeah. And I love that you I, I’ve heard what I’ve heard your shows, of course, I’ve listened to your shows. And so you I I hear so much of what you do that really I can see why it would resonate with you. Oh, thank you, my body spirit, but it’s so much more. Oh, yeah. There’s

8:22  

so many different pillars. Absolutely. So when it comes to servant leadership and whatnot, what do you think makes a great leader?

8:32  

Um, oh, you know what I heard this. This literally, I saw on LinkedIn from my daughter, our daughter is 30. She said Leanne, from a mom, I loved that. And I will tell you, I have carried around for many, many years. And I don’t have it right now in my my briefcase, but a general column pauwels 18 points of leadership. And one of my favorite parts of that was the good leader has the ability to anticipate. And so I’m always thinking, trying to think a step ahead of what could this do, you know, if I do this, what’s going to be the outcome, it helps me regulate my mouth and my actions? Sure. I really recommend it to other people to

9:16  

absolutely, I in the same way, but I had to really train myself to, you know, when you have the ability to anticipate you want to actually talk without listening, that’s that was my weakness with it to where I live the same way. But I actually have now in the past five or six years really learning to tune people in instead of wanting to come back with what do I want to say and I love that you said lead from among that, that’s beautiful. So when you’re working with Do you work with people one on one, or is

9:49  

a two I do everything I work a one on one and in groups and in large groups. I did a group of about 32 nights ago.

9:56  

Wow. So that’s fantastic. So is there any secret sauce that you use, Julie that if you don’t mind sharing that you have to maybe help them find their blind spots when they’re stuck with something.

10:12  

I think that they have to move. We all have to move from our head to our heart, when we’re feeling stuck. And sometimes when we’re headstrong, or even when we don’t know what to do, sometimes it’s not the straight shot, because I believe God has it all woven into us. And if we’ll sit with him and look for the opportunities that he presented, that’s when he wants us to step through. But so many times we want I know that I do I want to drive the bus, I want to drive it all the time, I want to drive the bus. But when I sat back, and I’ve been successful driving the bus, right, but I haven’t been fulfilled. And that’s what wellness is. Its fulfillment and contentment. I can have it all right, but not feel like I have it all. I feel like what’s missing, and sometimes it’s a it’s a 90 degree turn.

11:00  

I love it. I love that transparency. So which one of these seven? Are the focusing on wellness of the seven? Which one do you struggle with the most? This is high cholesterol,

11:17  

high cholesterol and i and i, you know I have I have the fitness going on, you know, we’re genetic, the one that I struggle the most with. I know the one that I that is really my entree into so many of the other ones is social wellbeing, okay, and I don’t really struggle with it. But because we moved around a lot as a military family, I did have to constantly find that new group and I have found that when my social wellness is struggling, I do like I love my favorite fast food, I stopped exercising as much, I start feeling unsettled at work, I have to have a core group, but it’s not like I’m always texting and talking, I just have to feel like I belong to a tribe. It might be because of that Nomad thing of moving around, you know, being a military and I wasn’t just a military wife. I mean, before that my dad was in construction. And it was a job that he moved around a lot. So we had never lived anywhere, like more than seven years. And seven was a long stretch. And so I think it’s that nomadic thing that makes and I’m an extrovert. So quarantine has caused me some unsettling, and a lot of introspection, and I think I’ve done really well with it. But I have not gotten my sea legs so to speak. Right,

12:37  

right. You know, they’re coming, though, you know, and you’ve adapted what, you know, everyone’s saying shift and pivot, I call it pivot. You know, everyone’s kind of doing that during these times and

12:47  

profanity.

12:52  

So was your family very supportive of you writing the book? Yeah, it’s

12:59  

interesting. Oh, my mother’s passed away. My dad, it has actually authored a book before. And he is very supportive always and always wants the best for us. But I will say that, that he didn’t seem as receptive to it at first. And I think he had to get past the part that I told some very personal stories in there. And I think as a father, he, he takes ownership for stuff that he shouldn’t write. And I was very delicate with it and I even talked to him about it, but I think that he had to read it a second time. And then he’s like, you know, this is gonna help a lot of people that he was really reading you know, I don’t tell just my personal stories as you know, I

13:41  

know it goes from person to person back to you

13:45  

professional stories

13:47  

and you own it which is so if I’m out networking and you know pressing some flashlights here in South Florida, we’re able to do no matter what you see on the the media, but we’re out we do home that networking events, and you know, I’m, you know, shut my mouth and open to my ears in someone’s asking me is how will How would I know, Julie? If they’re a good prospect, contact a referral for you.

14:15  

Um, I think that Oh, that’s a really hard question, Scott. But I think that it doesn’t really matter. I can’t even say that there’s somebody who knows God because I didn’t know God growing up and I was open and receptive. I think that if they are just, I don’t know, if they don’t mind speaking with somebody who has like, lays it all out. I can also give the hard information. But if they want to feel inspired, and they want to find that inner best self and they just keep looking, keep looking and haven’t gotten there. I think I would be a great person for them to speak to because I think one of the goals I mean, one of the mistakes A lot of people do is they start with the tools and the outcome. Okay, this is my goal. And these are the tools to get there. But that may be your goal like you know that story I said of Alexis, where she in the story in the book, she, she was always comfortable with her weight, but it was skydiving and not being able to get you know, down to 250 pounds, which was the rate restriction. It was really that her social network is what got her to her fitness. Love it. So we go straight to fitness stuff. You know, we think we think always first about the tools for finances. So let’s open up a bank account invest in a 401k. But sometimes our financial wellness or physical wellness is found in another one of the dimensions are Avenue. So we’ve got to stop. They need to be untraditional and be open to anything. Wow. Exploring any part of their their life.

15:51  

I love it. I love it. And then they want to start thinking, you know, from their heart a little bit as well start pulling it up into their head. So what keeps you up at night, Julie?

16:03  

God, I talk so much. And I’m thinking all the time when I hit my head hits the pillow, I’m that person that goes to sleep immediately. But like four or five hours later, so

16:14  

so like a five hour mark just like I

16:16  

am I am he will buy literally he will lay something on my heart. Like in I don’t know if it’s dreams or what but sometimes I just when I wake up, I’m like, Okay, now I got it. And he’s lay stuff on my heart. So I think he wakes me up to say, Okay, this is the direction. I know that sounds so weird. But it’s the truth.

16:38  

You know, I’m 100% I mean, my my squad knows it. And I’ve had people tune out for me, which is fine. But I’m a man of faith. And I, I was told by my mentor at my church of christ fellowship is that, you know, silence is God’s voice, like people are afraid to sit in silence and listen to it and use it. But silence is God’s voice talking to you. And that’s what I ask people. I mean, if you’re a meditator, and you’re not a person of faith, that’s still fine, still listen to the silence, because there’s voices to me, it’s God, you know, and again, I don’t disrespect anybody else’s beliefs. But to me, it’s God. And then that he’s talking to me during those those times of silence, and then all sudden, it’s kind of pulls into that intuition. And all sudden, you start acting out if you take action. And that’s one thing I was going to ask you about is, there’s a lot of talking to God in this book. What is your like, my, I don’t know if you know who Andy Andrews is, but he’s a Christian comedian. He wrote the book that I that changed my life, it’s called the travelers gift. And he sees easiest way to say this. He, he really kind of brought to the surface, that silence is God’s voice and that we need to be open and listening to it on a daily basis. Would you agree to that?

17:51  

Yeah, he nudges us. You know, a lot of people think what you know, people are afraid of what traditional religion has, has shared with them. And so I think that’s why folks get a little turned off. But really, all of those great things that are inside of your God. And so when you don’t really embrace God, and whatever your faith practice is, you’re not embracing yourself. I truly believe that the silence even though it’s hard to steal your mind, is the best place for me to literally to meet God. I know, I believe it’s for others to you’ve got to sit still with him and what impressions he puts on your heart.

18:24  

Absolutely. And so you saw the movie Back to the Future, I bring this

18:28  

up and all my favorite movies.

18:30  

Okay. So let’s go back in the DeLorean to the 2223 year old Miss Julie. I don’t know if it’s van orden then but let’s go back

18:37  

to Jones, chili Jones.

18:41  

J squared the Jay Jay, let’s go back to the 22 year old Julie, what kind of knowledge nuggets we call knowledge nuggets here today. What kind of knowledge nuggets are you dropping on? Julie with what you’ve learned now?

18:55  

Yeah. So high school was great. And when I came out of high school, and during that time period you’re asking about that was the time that was a biggest struggle struggle for me from around age 19 to about 22. And I would just say the Knowledge Nugget I would want her to know and I really want your listeners to know the squad is it gets better. And whenever you are having those valleys that is where your greatest successes are going to come. So Never give up. Never give up on God but don’t give up on yourself because that’s that’s where you’re meeting him. Those those valleys oh my gosh, there’s a scripture I love. And I probably would hose it right now if I tried to do it, but it’s really Consider it pure joy. My brothers and sisters when you face trials of many combos, yes, because it is through the testing of your faith sure that your resilience is built and that’s James. I think it’s James one person threw in love that

20:02  

I mean, even in what everyone knows Psalm 23, you know, he says, As I walk through the valley of the shadow, he doesn’t say sit there and wail. He says, get moving. You know, I believe that God is waiting on us. He’s given us what we have. And he’s giving us the nudges, like you say, you know, a lot of people I’m waiting on God, give me an answer. Well, I think he’s waiting on you to take action as well. You know, and that silence that you have, I love that you said that. So how do you want your dash? Remember then Julie, that little line in between your incarnation date and your expiration date? How do you want Julie’s dash remembered?

20:40  

In between birth and death? I would really, you know, there’s a saying from Maya Angelou. It’s not all people won’t remember what you said, but they will remember how they felt. I would really like people to have felt inspired, and in themselves, not by me in my life. But I would really love to be able to impart information or wisdom that people will feel so good about themselves, that they’ll just want to thrive and live and have joy and find it. You know,

21:13  

that is your living legacy. Come on, Julie. I mean, you know, all right. You know, it’s okay to say I’ll say it for you. You are I mean, I see you on your social You know, I’m so like, this book is just absolutely amazing. And you’re very welcome. But it’s you know, people, you’ve got to have that that go to you have to have that somebody or someone in your life that you know, kind of do life with, in a sense, lack of a better term, and how does Dan help you out with that?

21:49  

He’s, you know, Dan is like this. He’s the study of all our life because I am the Energizer Bunny. I’m up and down. I’m all over the place. Dan is a steady rock. I’m not kidding. You hear that all the time about Oh, he’s my rock. He truly is. That man is. He’s really my inspiration. And I want to tell you so many times, we’ve been together 40 years. I’ve been married. It’ll be 35 years in February. But we were together for five years before we got married. And he has always just he’s people like him because he’s not that type a person. He’s just a study rock. I literally one time when we were in base housing, and Whidbey Island, Washington, a prank, fall color cold in the middle of the night. And all I heard is him pick up the phone because you know, it’s before cell phones. And he’s like, no, really? Because I don’t think so. I don’t know. That’s not no higashino I know that you don’t want to do this. But you know, calling people he couldn’t have this conversation for 10 minutes I got What was that? He knows it was a prank, fall color. And they were telling me what they were doing to themselves at that moment. And they apologize why they taught me because he’s empathic empathize with him. It just never he never runs out of empathy.

23:05  

I love it’s the most amazing

23:07  

person I have ever met. I am so like, I felt fortunate from the very beginning that I got him and that I got to keep him because I don’t want to say I’m a hard person to live with a lot of energy. This all the time.

23:22  

He’s like my Susan, she’s that. And I’m law you know, so when I’m off the clock, I can just be me you like and not to say I’m not me, but just rocking the lightning garden took me a long time to find find something to work you just really let my guard down and God provider which is a fantastic so truly three things you can’t live without. And let’s let’s leave out electronics. Yeah. And I think God’s number one, okay, elevation.

23:53  

I can’t live without the salvation of Jesus. That Jesus sacrifice. I can’t live without forgiveness. Because I make a lot of mistakes and I appreciate you. Forgive me. And really the Freedom, freedom to have faith. I do worry about freedom.

24:18  

Absolutely. Absolutely. So as we wind things down just a little bit here, Julie. I have my leveling up lightning round. Okay, okay, you and I could talk an hour on each one of these questions and we probably still keep going on on every question, but you got five seconds. No explanations. Okay. Got it. Right Iraq. So let’s level up. What is the best leveling up advice you’ve ever received?

24:43  

From my Uncle Ben, who I hadn’t met in five seconds. Always go the extra mile from Uncle Ben Jones passed away now.

24:52  

Excellent. Sure one of your personal personal habits that contributes to your success.

24:58  

I don’t procrastinate. And I’m disciplined. Love it. I think they go hand in hand. Love it.

25:04  

So not the good book or not the book you’re reading not reading out or the book you wrote. If I’m in my doldrums snap feeling it. Is there any kind of go to book like mindset traveler’s gift by Andy Andrews. He’s a Christian comedian that I told you about. Is there any good book that you kind of would say Fergie, here, read this?

25:25  

Um, I’ve got to tell you my favorite thing is the book The 10th book of the New Testament, which is a feagins. And I love the full Oh, God. And I tell people all the time put on your armor. And people have said that to me before I put on to put on get into your shoes of peace. Love it. Yeah. I love it. Everything that I need is there.

25:45  

Yeah, it is. Fantastic. So what’s your most commonly used emoji when you text?

25:51  

I like I like the the smile emoji with a little too pink. rosy cheeks. Love it. I use it all the time.

26:00  

So not the age you are now. Okay, I know you feel great. You look great. And if you’re watching YouTube, she’s a beautiful woman. But if you can stay one age for the rest of your life, have the wisdom you do now and continue to learn what would it be? And don’t lie.

26:15  

I’d really like to be 35

26:20  

when you said that you’ve been together 40 years people if you’re watching this, this woman does not look anywhere near she could have been with someone because I’ll tell you what we said when we were 22 when she was 22. Her name is still Julie Jones. Okay, so if you look at this woman in the 35, I say 28 to 32 in between that age, thank you for being honest, I love you for that. So what any favorite charity organizations that you’d like to give you time and or money to?

26:46  

Yeah, Dan and I actually contributed four years for Travis Mannion foundation. And we also I I started running with the team, our web, red, white and blue team when I was in Houston, and so I love that organization. And then personally as a business owner, I contribute to a new organization and sponsor of them it’s treasured vessels Foundation, which helps provide transitional housing to women in the North Dallas area, or the North Texas area who have been rescued from sex trafficking.

27:22  

Yes, doing that. So last question. You can elaborate a little bit but what’s your favorite decade of music? 60s 70s

27:30  

Oh my gosh, the 80s please. Oh my gosh, and I was a country girl but who didn’t? Oh, yes. I’m a country girl. But who doesn’t love Michael and Madonna? Oh my gosh,

27:42  

it’s so funny. You say that because the 80s was full of kind of one name people where you could say it. Michael Madonna Prince

27:50  

das grandson.

27:51  

Like they were like Van Halen. It was like names. You know? These are actually the names of the performers. You know, Elton. I mean, when she was more kind of 70s still, you say those names the 80s brought that even even if you’re into rap like Run DMC. It was like it was it was

28:11  

the beginning of rap.

28:12  

It was such a transitional time. You had the British invasion, you know? Yes, underground and all that stuff. So yeah, yeah, you’re right. I mean,

28:20  

you can dance anybody who can’t dance could dance to music.

28:24  

Exactly. Thank you for saying that. I love you. I love you anymore. So how can we find you Julie?

28:31  

Oh well with god.com or j van orden got.com

28:35  

I love it in squat. I am going to first one to comment or make a comment on my LinkedIn post Instagram pose Twitter post it you can find all her links here in the show notes we’ll get a free copy signed by me what I’ll do is I’ll order it Julie will sign it and there she’ll take care of the postage that’d be fantastic. If not is no you the money for the postage I love to get that out to you

28:59  

Julie and I’ll throw in the journal that goes with it

29:04  

yeah Julie leave us with one last Knowledge Nugget that we can take with us internalize and take action

29:12  

all right you ready without God infused in your well being physical is just a body financial is just money. Mental is just thoughts environmental is just space occupational is just a job intellectual is just a hobby and social is just friends without God he’s what moves it from wellness a thing to the essence of who you are which is your well being

29:42  

Wow. So wellness to well being love it love it in squad we just had you just had a free masterclass with my really good friend Julie van or Neil who’s gonna remind you to lead from among and also have the ability to anticipate anticipate means kind of shut up and listen, and then formulate the response. instead of reacting. You know, if you’re stuck, you know, you want to move your head from your head to your heart, Julie is the person that I’d love to introduce you to, she’s going to tell you to find your inner best self. And that is another introduction that can make the Julie cuz she can help you do that. And she’s going to remind you, if you’re stuck, it gets better valleys or you’re in you’re in the valleys are your greatest successes. So like I always say, enjoy the journey, no matter where you’re at. You call on God to help you give you that nudge to kind of push you through, you know, and she wants you to feel inspired and have impart wisdom in to yourself by getting with God, reading what you really want to read every day that’s gonna help you level up and also journal which is very big with Julia as well. And you know what, without God and fuse, you know, in both and all the physical, occupational, mental, intellectual, financial, environmental and social, you really can’t be well being, you need to infuse God in all seven of those pillars to do that. And Julie does it Julie’s beautiful. She’s humble, she’s healthy. She’s wealthy. I’m so glad that you came on. I’m so privileged to be Thank you so, so much for coming with library in the future.

31:21  

Yes, it was my privilege anytime.

31:23  

Thanks, Julie. We’ll talk soon.

31:24  

Thank you.

31:26  

Hey, thanks so much for listening to this episode of time to shine today podcast, proudly brought to you by southern New Jersey real estate real estate excellence that can be reached at 561-249-7266 and online at www dot Sutter in nugent.com. If you’re a business owner or professional who would like to be interviewed on time to shine today, please visit time to shine today.com slash guest. If you liked this episode, please subscribe on Apple podcasts, Google podcasts, Stitcher, Spotify, I Heart Radio or wherever you get your podcasts. There’s a link in the show notes to our website. Also there you will see a recommended resources. We hope that you will support our show by supporting them. If you like what you have been listening to, it’d be great if you could just give us a five star rating and tell your friends how to subscribe while you’re at it. I’m your host, Scott Ferguson. And until next time, let’s level up it’s our time to shine.

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