201-Purposefully Seek Fulfillment in Your Life – TTST Interview with Bob DePasquale

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Welcome to Episode 201! Bob DePasquale is a passionate impact maker that loves helping people find their purpose.  Also a testicular cancer survivor. Bob believes we have all been given great skills to make the world a better place. Remember Our Troops! Enjoy!

I understand that I can’t change the whole world, but daily I strive to change the world for one person

– Bob DePasquale

Knowledge Nuggets and Take-Aways

1. Critically important to care for others you don’t necessarily know or know you are caring for them (example of Bob’s wife)

2. Use your talents for good

3. Daily live out your passions

4. When starting to work with a coach, ask them what are they going to do to help them experience your passion

Level Up! 

Fergie

Recommended Resources – Hover and Click

www.BobDePasquale.com 

Bob’s Linked IN

Bob’s Twitter

Bob’s Instagram

Bob’s Book he recommends: Rocket Fuel by Gino Wickman

Host Your Podcast for Free with Buzz Sprout 

Our Show Sponsor Sutter and Nugent Real Estate – Real Estate Excellence 

Music Courtesy of: fight by urmymuse (c) copyright 2018 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license. http://dig.ccmixter.org/files/urmymuse/58696 Ft: Stefan Kartenberg, Kara Square

Speech Transcript

Unknown Speaker  0:00  

Hey, this is Bob DePasquale

Unknown Speaker  0:01  

quality from the speaking of impact podcast. And if you really want to learn how to level up your life, you should be listening to the time to shine today podcast with my good friend Scott Ferguson

Unknown Speaker  0:13  

time to shine today podcast varsity squad. It is Scott Ferguson and I am so stoked to bring you Episode 201 from my survivor and also thriver friend, Bob Deepa squale, Baba encountered the C word the big cancer when he was a very young man. And, you know, he had people caring for him praying for him, his wife, before he was his wife, or even knew that she was gonna be his wife was praying, forming. And it’s just he believes, you know, he overcame that. And he faces adversity daily, just like we all do. But he also always sets the example to level up, you know, he wants you to remember that you want to care for people that don’t even necessarily know that you’re caring for them. I’m just going to stop because Bob dropped so many knowledge nuggets that I want you to hear for yourself. So without further ado, here’s my really good friend, Bob D pet squale. From Bab te D pet squale. Media. Let’s level up.

Unknown Speaker  1:19  

Time to shine today podcast varsity squad leader Scott Ferguson, and I got my buddy here, Bob D pass squale. Everyone can lead to fulfillment. Everyone else can encourage I’m sorry, everyone can lead a life of everyone else can encourage and empower them to do it. That’s what Bob lives by. He’s a cancer survivor. He’s an only child. So he kind of knows what it’s like to get a lot of attention and then maybe go through abandonment issues. Afterward, where you don’t you kind of feel alone. Bob’s a passionate impact maker that loves helping people find their purpose. He believes we all have been given great skills to make the world a better place. He has the speaking of impact podcast after this interview, don’t jump over to it right now. But after this interview, go out and check out his last interview I believe was with Mr. Russo, which is just fantastic. So make sure you jump over to that. And also he just posted yesterday on Instagram, a post about clarity and persuasion. You got to check that out as well. So I’m gonna bring Bob on now Bob, thank you so much for joining the time to shine today varsity squad. Come on, introduce yourself. And first, what’s your favorite color

Unknown Speaker  2:27  

and why my favorite color is red. That’s right, I got a red microphone and a red shirt.

Unknown Speaker  2:33  

My man he’s like Tiger Woods, he brings it he brings there’s a massive behind me because you’re a podcast, what I use is the red one, I can kind of get an idea of maybe some traits that they have. But to all your marketing that comes on the audio Graham’s and all that jazz will be read as well. So we’d like to kind of build it up around that man. So come on it again. I’m so happy you’re here. But let’s get to the origins of Bob man. I mean, let’s talk a little bit about cancer surviving only child and work your way up into the origins of your business.

Unknown Speaker  3:01  

Yeah, absolutely. I was born in Long Island, New York and with around a bunch of family. Somewhere along the lines. My parents said, You know what, we’re sick of the cold weather and, and the traffic and everything up on Long Island. And they said, we’re gonna take little Bobby john, that’s what they called me as a kid. And we’re gonna go down to Florida, we’re going to enjoy the weather and different atmosphere. And they were kind of the black sheep of the family, if you will. Everyone lived up in New York. And they said, we’re getting out of here. Right? And we did. We loved it. Life is great. Growing up down here. I still live in the same hometown, Western Florida that I that I grew up in. And somewhere somewhere along the lines, I decided crazy enough that I wanted to go back to New York for college. And when I was up when I was up there for college, can no you’re 18, you think you’re kind of invisible. And you’re a crazy, crazy person. And I was up there going to a football training camp. And in a matter of about four days, I was diagnosed with testicular cancer. And a few days after that, we were at my uncle’s house. And his best friend came over and was so apologetic about what was going on with us that he let us have his car. But I borrowed it because my parents were up there visiting, they came up for my first game, which obviously I didn’t plan. And he basically just gave him the car, and they were so thankful, didn’t know what to do. And then a couple days, a couple days later, I was coming out of class, my oncologist told me still take a couple of courses while we’re figuring out your treatment. And I saw in the distance a plane flying and it hit the Twin Towers. And you know, you’re 18 you’re like what is going on? And I spoke with my father and he’s like, you should probably come back to the house here because it looks like something’s going on. then bam. I was the other the other plane hit. And it was just an incredible, incredible experience. So it took me nine hours, nine hours to make a 15 minute drive. from school back to my uncle’s house. I ran out of gas in the neighborhood, push the car into the driveway, and I was like wasn’t feeling too good because I was, I was sick with cancer, right, and I get back there. And we were just devastated. My uncle was out of town on a we didn’t know he was supposed to fly back that morning. Thankfully, we found out that he was okay. But Tim, the gentleman that lent us my mom uncle’s best friend that let us borrow the car was in the towers. And so in a matter of about four days, I went from being on top of the world to being sick. And then this the terrorist attacks, it was just a crazy time in life. And so, you know, when all those things are going on, and you’re used to kind of being the center of attention as the, as the only child, and now you’re sick, and you don’t know what to do, it was just a crazy, crazy period of my life. And so I’ve always since that happened, I’ve always told myself, that I’m going to give people attention when they’re when they’re in need. And that’s been something I’ve lived by for quite a while, because I know that there’s people out there and need right now I’m healthy. Thank the Lord, I’m a healthy person. So I need to give back I need to give, give my energies now to the people to the people who are in need. So that is a quick story.

Unknown Speaker  6:04  

That No, that’s all. I mean, it’s it’s sad when you’re not sad. I mean, you know what, you went through something in life, and it’s and you battled it and you you prevailed, and, you know, time to shine today about you know, our motto is we don’t want to have anyone to feel like they have no one. And that you and I resonate so much with our audiences with that. That’s fantastic. So you made the commitment to yourself to give people the attention when they are need, like, how did you start that? And what did you do with to build your company? Well,

Unknown Speaker  6:35  

I’ll tell you, I’ll tell you a quick story about that to my wife, God bless her too. She’s She’s one of the most patient people with someone like me, who is used to being the only child and also had medical issues. And so she’s she’s a servant at heart, a kindergarten teacher. So you know, she’s got patients, that’s why she married me. And, but I always tell this story as well. Because when she was in when she was in high school, she used to have this teacher that would always talk about the future spouses of the people in the class. And you know, you’re a 1415 year old girl, you’re like, I’m not thinking about my future spouse at this point in my life. But he always encouraged them, to think about those people. And he was a very, very faithful man, he would tell them to pray for your future spouse. And when my wife and I met, she didn’t know what was going on with me. But you know, at a certain point, we were started getting these discussions. And while I was 18, and I was just a freshman in college there, she was in that class with that with that guy with a teacher two years before that, in her junior year of high school. And during all that period of when I was struggling, she was thinking about me and Karen, you know, in caring for him praying for me. And we were like, I cannot believe this, this happened. So she didn’t even know me at that point. But she was, in a way caring for me. And we got married, we had this conversation about this, and how important it is to care for people that you don’t even necessarily know. And so in my business in the past 11 years of my life, I’ve been starting families, and helping them manage their financial lives by teaching them good habits, helping them make wise decisions, when it comes to taxes, investments, any of those sort of things. And you’re right in front of those people, and you know, every little last detail about them. And I would come home and my wife would be like, Great, so you help those people. But what about the people that maybe what else? Can we do more than just your profession? What else can you do in life to be a servant, and she taught me that lesson. umpteen times over.

Unknown Speaker  8:39  

So that, so you got a ride or die there and your lady, which is fantastic. And I and I do as well. So when you’re working with people, so if I’m out at a networking event, which in software to hear where, by the way, squad that you know, Bob and I are kind of neighbors about 40 miles apart, 50 miles apart. You know, if I’m at a networking event, pressing flash, or even virtually how if I’m listening to somebody, how will I know if they would be a good referral connection or a contact for

Unknown Speaker  9:10  

any anyone who has a passion for health for helping others and doing good in the world making a positive impact. That’s what we’re all about making an impact in the world. And it doesn’t have to be I’m glad you brought this up too. Because it’s it doesn’t have to be, you don’t have to be the president of the United States. You don’t have to impact 50 million people. I heard this once and it’s always stuck with me. You may not be able to change the world, but you can change the world for one person. And so if any of you have a passion for helping people, and you really care about a specific cause, whatever it might be, whether it is global, or maybe it’s just something at home, maybe it’s in your community or neighborhood, I’d love to talk to you and flesh that out help you live out the purpose and your passion. I know a lot. We know a lot of people that work very, very hard these days, even in the pandemic with all of this Zoom meetings. I mean, I spend hours a day on the computer and I get a little cooped up. But I’m still working really, really hard. And a lot of people are overworked. And I found that it’s distracting them from their passion and their purpose. You have to be, they get 10 emails a day inviting them to six different a bunch of different webinars. And they feel like they have to spend all that time in professional development.

Unknown Speaker  10:24  

Right. Right. Absolutely. So when you’re bringing somebody in, yeah, you’re right, this pandemic has a lot of people pulled in different directions. And they have to make the choices. If when you’re bringing somebody in to work with you, is there any secret sauce, if you don’t mind sharing, to maybe help them find that blind spot?

Unknown Speaker  10:43  

secret sauce, I would say the first thing is you have to sit down and really internalize what you really care about the most what makes you tick, what do you get most excited about? For some people, it is their profession, they jump up in the morning at five in the morning, they can’t wait to get to work. For other people, that could be a drag, and they can’t wait to get off so that they can go support whatever it is whatever they care about. So the first thing is sit down and says What do you actually feel excited about? I think a lot of people would be would be surprised that there are a lot of things that do excite them, they just don’t do them enough, or they don’t experience them enough. And I’m not talking about watching a TV show, or, you know, eating dinner. I mean, I love to eat and just the thought of food gets me excited. But I’m talking about things that are really, that that really change you that really make you feel joyful. And there’s an IV, you’d be surprised most of people that I talked to, they don’t even realize that there’s five or 10 things that they can go in different directions that they can go.

Unknown Speaker  11:49  

Yeah, absolutely. You’re helping them guy you’re not consulting and telling them this is what it is. You’re finding their passion, what makes them tick gets them excited, and start that as a ramping bore. I absolutely love that, Bob. So when you’re bringing somebody in, and you’re in that kind of discovery period with them, is there any good question that maybe you would wish they would ask you but never do?

Unknown Speaker  12:11  

Oh, man? Well, I honestly that’s a good question. I wish they would ask me that. What was the question that I should ask you? I would say I would say for most people as opposed to as opposed to starting from a negative point. Whereas Oh, you know, I’m depressed or I’m struggling with this. I need your help. I would I would ask a question, or I would be interested to speaking with people directly more and this is where I try to guide them is more about what what can I do to experience my passion more? Or when I’m feeling joyful? Why Why do I feel that way? Not Why do I feel bad? or Why do I feel Why am I struggling with this? Wow,

Unknown Speaker  12:56  

that’s strong, bro. I’m writing that down. Sorry for the delay squad. You know, what can I do to mate to experience my passion? What you already know that they’re excited about? Yang makes them tick in that that’s awesome. So then, let’s get in to our you saw Back to the Future. If you were 18 in 2001. So I’m sure you remember Marty McFly, right? Yes, sir. Let’s get in that DeLorean with Mario. Let’s go back to the 2223 year old Bob de past squale. What kind of knowledge I guess would we call him here time to shine today? What kind of knowledge nuggets are you dropping on bob to make him maybe shorten his learning curve level up and blast through maybe even a little quicker.

Unknown Speaker  13:38  

Love it. Love it. So I went through that time in my life when I was 18. I really, really struggled. And so you know, I was an extremely aggressive form of cancer that spread to my abdomen. And so it my oncologist was confident that I would be healthy if we started treatment immediately right away. But if we didn’t, and we didn’t catch it, it could have been really tough. In fact, my trainer at school, there was the one who told me you know what this injury that we think you have is more than an injury. So anyway, I still felt at that time that I was pushing through and cancer wasn’t going to take me down an IV cancer. It was all me. And so you asked me when I was 2223 in that range. So you’re talking three or four years later, five years later from when I actually went through my treatment, and I would have told myself at that time. It wasn’t just you. You weren’t the one you didn’t defeat cancer. It was multiple people helping you if it wasn’t for Rick, who said you know what? You got to stop rehabbing a pulled groin. You need to go to a urologist if it wasn’t for the urologist who said you know what, I don’t really see anything but you need an ultrasound if it wasn’t for the oncologist to come up with a treatment plan. If it wasn’t for my parents to support me and give me everything I could possibly need to survive. I would have made it wasn’t for my wife who was praying for me and she didn’t even know me. Oh me.

Unknown Speaker  14:57  

Yeah.

Unknown Speaker  14:58  

Wow. When you’re 22 23 you may be educated, because you went to school, and you may have you may know more than you did when you’re 18. But you should rely on the other people in your life. And if you don’t, you’re going to end up in a tough spot

Unknown Speaker  15:12  

that is insanely awesome. Yeah, that teamwork. That’s all there because there’s a lot of things. It’s working all under a man of faith, by the way them all in their God’s vision and stuff like that. And you put those people in my opinion in your life, to help you blast through and I love it that you’re bringing gratitude back to them. Now, Bob, that’s, that’s key. So how do you want your dash remembered then that little line in between your incarnation date and your expiration date your life date and death day? How do you want Bob’s dash remember?

Unknown Speaker  15:40  

I wanted two things. One is he was a servant at heart. He wanted to help whatever it could be. We use my talents for positive impact. And number two is learning. I think the people that I admire the most were lifelong learners. And they use that learning what they learned for good but they were always learning

Unknown Speaker  16:01  

and love that. I love it. Yeah, it’s you have to it’s a continuous I’m the same way I’m coming up. I’m 50 years old and I’m still my mentor always told me I was younger man. You never know enough. keep grinding keep going in. So then what keeps Bob up at night?

Unknown Speaker  16:19  

Things that I can’t. Things that I don’t do well, are things that I struggle to improve. Yeah.

Unknown Speaker  16:28  

I feel you man. I’m the same way I’ll sit there and go why. But then what I learned also Bob is like, you know, Leah Woodford Tommy you know, get your asking year. You know, like, if you don’t know something, there’s so many people out there especially right now during this whole COVID thing. I mean, squat, Bob, and I probably might not even a mat if it wasn’t for COVID in a sense, because everything’s going virtual, and how we’re how we’re going with this pandemic and 9655 days or whatever that we’re going through here. But, you know, what do you think that Bob is something that people misunderstand about you the most?

Unknown Speaker  17:05  

Oh, wow, that’s a that’s a great one. I would say. I would say a lot of people don’t realize, I mean, I really I’m super passionate about these subjects. And really, you know, being a good steward of the resources and the guests that I’ve been blessed with for sure. I would say that some people may not realize that I really, I am a pretty loose and Goofy guide. In all honesty, I love passion and purpose. And I want people to really care and know that they can make a difference in the world. Sure. But there’s no that no one loves a good sarcastic joke. Or often. I was I was catching up with my buddy who I did play ball at in college with and went to school with. And he moved down down here a couple weeks ago. And I was telling you before we jumped on, in we had the greatest time reminiscing about some of the dumbest things that happened those four years of college, right? And it was just it was great

Unknown Speaker  17:55  

things that only you and him would probably understand if you’re talking about a lot of times I know. That was my Navy boys. It’s like, dude, we’ll talk about stuff and other people are like, how’s that even funnier? Right, that’s awesome. So who’s had the most profound impact in your life?

Unknown Speaker  18:11  

Well, I mentioned my wife, so I

Unknown Speaker  18:13  

hope you’re gonna say that.

Unknown Speaker  18:15  

So I don’t want I’m not gonna, I’m not gonna shortchange her. She’s she, she is the number one for sure. But but one other person. One of the person that I’ll mention is, is my mother. And the reason why I mentioned my mother is because she was the one I mentioned, that kind of was the kind of the black sheep of the family moving down to Florida, at 30, or whatever years old, she was, you know, a new parent and, and she was working in supermarkets for her whole life. And that’s actually how she met my dad. But she ended up not being able to get a job there. And was thinking about not getting a job, but we she needed to work. And so she ended up switching over into the banking industry. And she worked her way up from, from being just a teller all the way to being a manager, and then and then actually ended up working with with me for quite a while. And she’s one of those people that can learn anything,

Unknown Speaker  19:10  

and pick it up and be proficient with it.

Unknown Speaker  19:13  

Yeah, so he’s made such an impact on me, you know, doing so many different things and being successful in so many different ways. And she recently retired, so I’m kind of jealous of that, too.

Unknown Speaker  19:23  

So So, let’s go another way here, who’s giving you the worst advice you’ve ever gotten?

Unknown Speaker  19:29  

Oh, wow. One of my one of my teachers in high school. So so I’m left handed. Okay. Just another strange thing about southie.

Unknown Speaker  19:38  

All right, very cool.

Unknown Speaker  19:39  

Yeah. So so I’m left handed and one of my teachers in high school. And she she insisted that we write in erasable pen, we couldn’t use pencil, we couldn’t use regular pen. And she said that you need to write an erasable pen because that’s going to teach you to be more consistent with your handwriting, but if you make a mistake, you can fix it. I smeared the ink all over the crops. Right? Because that’s just how I write. Right and I was probably that that might have been the worst advice I ever got at least as a young person

Unknown Speaker  20:14  

than for you to even bring it up an answer that quick. That’s awesome. It sticks out to you. That’s fantastic. So Bob, what would your definition of life will live be

Unknown Speaker  20:25  

a life well lived is is a life where you’re using the talents that you have for good and enjoying it as well because we all have some talents that you probably aren’t thrilled with, you know, that you don’t do but there’s definitely something that you have that you enjoy and are really really good at. So life well lived is doing those things being fulfilled and helping other people feel the same.

Unknown Speaker  20:50  

Love it. I love all about that fulfillment and squad. Hey, time to shine today varsity squad. We are back with my good friend Bob squale. And Bob, we got our leveling up lightning round now. Okay, you there’s five or six questions, you. I don’t want any explanations. I just want the first thing goes your head. You got five seconds on each one you and I could talk for an hour on each one of these. But I need the quickest answer that you have possible. You’re ready. Do it. Let’s do it. Let’s level up. Bob, what’s the best leveling up advice you’ve ever received?

Unknown Speaker  21:22  

Keep reading and learning.

Unknown Speaker  21:24  

Yes, sure. One of your personal habits to contribute to your success is to keep reading. Alright, other than your own website and my website time to shine today.com and I’m going to give them a plug out here at Bob deepest past squale.com. Other than those two websites where do you go to to level up?

Unknown Speaker  21:44  

Forbes

Unknown Speaker  21:45  

Forbes Love it. Love it. If I’m in my doldrums not feeling it? Kind of like Fergie here, read this book. What book is?

Unknown Speaker  21:53  

Um, I would say it’s Oh, man, it’s a tough one. The What’s the name of it?

Unknown Speaker  22:03  

Hmm.

Unknown Speaker  22:07  

This is terrible. I can’t think of the name of it. All right, I’m gonna, I’m gonna have to pivot here. This is way more than five seconds. I’m gonna pivot to the Bible.

Unknown Speaker  22:18  

There you go. There you go. Hey, that’s fine. It’s crazy. I’m gonna break my own rule here. Everyone’s like pivot now. Like 10 years ago, it was shift right? I call it ship it so we’re gonna ship it on that one. What’s your most commonly used emoji when you text?

Unknown Speaker  22:32  

Thumbs up

Unknown Speaker  22:32  

love it. You can be one age physically Don’t bullshit me here. Excuse my language. Do not. Do not say if you can say one age physically for the rest of your life. Keep the wisdom you’ve garnered and keep getting gaining more wisdom. What age would you stay physically for the rest of your life?

Unknown Speaker  22:48  

27

Unknown Speaker  22:49  

love it. I’m glad you said that cuz I’m 30 I would say 32 all day. That’s awesome. What’s your favorite charity and organization you like to give your time or money to

Unknown Speaker  22:58  

Habitat for Humanity?

Unknown Speaker  23:00  

Yes. Last question. You can elaborate on this one just a little bit but what is the best decade of music 6070s 80s or 90s 90s 90s my man I love that so Bob How can we find your brother

Unknown Speaker  23:12  

Bob dipasquale calm simplest plays catch the blog in the in the podcast there and then I’d be deep Hobie de EPA, Twitter Instagram the my favorite platforms.

Unknown Speaker  23:24  

I love that I love that. Leave us with one more in squat all of those will be in the show notes by the way so make sure you go there and also go to the speaking of impact podcast as well which that’ll be in the show notes as well. In Bob leave us with one last Knowledge Nugget you want us to take with us internalize and take action

Unknown Speaker  23:42  

Yep, live with live with purpose.

Unknown Speaker  23:45  

And in squad we’ve just got basically a free masterclass for my really good friend here. Bob Pasquali my neighbor in a sense, you know comes from a big family Bobby john, love that. I love that. You know, he wants to give people attention when they are in need. You know, he wants to care for others who don’t even necessarily know that you’re caring for them. And that’s huge. That is huge. Something he kind of picked up from his lovely wife, and he’s exercising that every day. You know, you’ll ask himself What else can you do to help? What else can you do to help in all times, it’ll tell you you can’t change the whole world but you can change the world for one person. So get out there live out intentionally. And get out there and Live Your Passion Bible remind you to live your passion, internalize what makes you tick and get you excited. You know, if you’re working with a coach, ask them what they can do to you do for you to help you experience those passions. He would remind himself and also you that teamwork, I mean, he had his trainer wreck he had his urologist, oncologist and then family. They’re all on his side right at the level up for him. You know he was going to be remembered as someone to serve it. They wanted to help him always learn and he wants to use his talents for good and live with purpose. Bob, thank you so much for coming on to the time shine today varsity squad. You’re humble yet you’re hungry. you level up your health level up your wealth. Thank you so much look forward to collaborating very soon with you, brother.

Unknown Speaker  25:10  

That’s awesome Scott ppreciate it and the book is rocket fuel rocket fuel. Great book by the way, I’ll

Unknown Speaker  25:16  

throw that in the show notes. Awesome, man. Appreciate you talk soon. Hey, thanks so much for listening to this episode of time to shine today podcast. Proudly brought to you by Southern Nugent real estate real estate excellence who can be reached at 561-249-7266 in online at www dot Sutter in nugent.com. If you’re a business owner or professional who would like to be interviewed on time to shine today, please visit time to shine today.com flash guest. If you liked this episode, please subscribe on Apple podcasts, Google podcasts, Stitcher, Spotify, I Heart Radio or wherever you get your podcast. There’s a link in the show notes to our website. Also there you will see our recommended resources. We hope that you will support our show by supporting them. If you like what you have been listening to, it’d be great if you could just give us a five star rating and tell your friends to subscribe while you’re at it. I’m your host, Scott Ferguson. And until next time, let’s level up. It’s our time to shine.

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